illus5040/5020: Sketchbooks and Inky drawings

I started a whole new sketchbook for this brief, that means I'm feeling particularly enthusiastic! I usualy work with ring binder A4 sketchbooks, i preferred the fact I could fold it over however I am enjoying working on A5 and working across two pages, there's something quite satisfying about going across both pages. 

So this post is going to be about the first week of work I've done based on the brief about ink drawing! I tried as many techniques as I could however about half way through the week I was more focused on the content I was producing than the techniques I was practicing. However I was thoroughly enjoying ink drawing over the past week, more than I thought I would. I felt a bit rusty drawing as over lockdown drawing never really came easily to me. I'm sure other people felt the same way, it was a common issue for artists and illustrators and designers alike. But this felt rather refreshing, it felt like I was just drawing for the sake of drawing for the first time in a long time. 

The first thing I felt like drawing was hands, of all things. I'm not sure why, the idea just suddenly came to me. Perhaps because I need to practice hands, they are something that I've always struggled with anatomy wise. I'm sure a lot of people have the struggle so I thought I'd hit two birds with one stone and practice both my hand anatomy and ink drawing. Most of this is done with either brush pens, felt pens, fine liners and bottled ink and brush. Sadly over the past week I haven't had time to go to the campus and buy or find my dip pens so I haven't used them yet. However I'm fairly happy with the work I've produced so far with the pens and brushes. You will probably notice throughout my sketchbook I like to write whatever pops into my head alongside my drawings. Most of the time I'm not even consciously doing it, it's just if I feel compelled to write something I will write it. None of the notes are deep or meaningful. Just ideas, most of the time. 

The next few drawings I did were mostly random photographs I found in my phone, just finding images that stood out to me. Some obviously more detailed than others. I particularly enjoyed drawing the window in my bedroom. I live in the attic room in a house I'm sharing with other students. It's actually a really spacious room despite the fairly low ceiling and during the day I get a lot of really nice natural lighting. The skylights face right onto my desk so really it's an ideal workspace for drawing! I was mostly focusing on capturing light and shadow as effectively as I could. I think for one of my first attempts of the year, it's not too bad. Obviously there is refining to do but there always is. I hadn't realised until later on in the week that the drawing I had done was relevant to the overall outcome of the brief. 

I don't know what compelled me exactly to take on such a task as drawing the view from my window but for some reason I felt like I could do it. Now, I'm really not one for drawing buildings and landscapes, I usually despise it. I love other artworks of urban landscapes but I could never do it myself. Perhaps because I never learnt perspective in the past or perhaps because I felt like the details were too much for me, but it's 2020, the year I've said if it can happen, it will happen. Before I interpreted it as if something negative can happen, it will happen. However, why not me getting all passionate about drawing buildings? If it can happen, it will. Did I enjoy drawing this? No, it was hard. Did it feel rewarding? Yes, it really did. It felt like I had achieved something in the past i never would have bothered to try and achieve. It was a good feeling. For the first time in a while art was hard and I struggled and felt like crying and I haven't felt like that in a while. I feel like sometimes, I can get very complacent with my drawings and stick to what I know. 

Sure, I'm fully aware my final drawing was far from perfect or well drawn. Sure, I could do better and it's really not that good and I can see my mistakes in it but for a first attempt in a long time at doing something out of my comfort zone, I was happy. I'm still happy with it. I probably should have stuck to one technique of using fine liners for the whole thing, the brush marks make things seem kind of messy but at the time I felt like it was the only way to convey the mossy rusty look the roofs looked. There were probably other ways I could have done it with mark making but at the time, I was probably tired. This drawing spanned over a day and a bit to produce, not that significant particularly. But I'm one of those impatient people who likes to get a drawing done as fast as possible, possibly why I prefer digital art over analogue. I lack patience, but I feel like at least this year has taught me how to be a little more patient. I feel slower rather than the fast pace I used to go about doing everything. The easy route no longer feels like an option to me. 

The drawings from the rest of the week may seem kind of lackluster and I definitely probably could have done more, however this week ended up being harder than I thought. My cat who I've had for the past 14-15 years died this week. It was a sudden loss, and I don't particularly like to make excuses but I didn't really feel up for drawing and that is on me for not getting over the loss I suppose, But I tried my best to draw! It felt heavy for the rest of the week so I'm sorry if everything feels lackluster. 

The final drawing I did for the week was one I've been trying to do for, several months now and that's record myself as the months go by. Sadly I only took two pictures of myself and that was about at the start of lockdown and the other was, well, today. I kind of wanted to record if I changed physically or if I viewed myself differently at the time. It's kind of weird because the me on the left I barely recognise, at the time I took that picture everything felt like it was the end of the world and I was having a hard time accepting my life had been stripped away from me for the time being. Maybe that drawing conveys it subconsciously, I was trying to draw myself honestly but even the drawing I don't recognise myself as myself whereas the one on the right just feels like regular old me. Fat, tired, me. The me on the left had a tiny amount of hope in her that things were going to get better. At the time, I felt like I would be stuck at home doing nothing for the next year and that I'd never go back to the life I had before. I remember it being such an exhausting feeling and I'm sure a lot of people out there had similar feelings. I don't remember much about the me from then, it was like I disassociated from myself to cope with things and I couldn't tell you much about what happened at the time.